learning learning learning

I want this post to be about things I've been learning at my internship. Not just about the job, but about myself. Most of my posts have been "I did this, I did that..." but I think what I'd like to look back on the most is my reflections on how I've changed and my feelings about how my internship is going. So here are a few things that I've been learning/reflecting on lately...

 1. I'm braver than I think I am!!! Things aren't as scary as I think they are, I am capable of more than I think I am, I am better at what I do than I think I am. I just have to believe it- that's where confidence comes in and I know I can be confident! And being confident makes you feel better, perform better, think better... It's just an all around cycle of positivity!

 2. I've been learning many "counseling ideas." Like little things that you say over and over that can relate to many situations. Kind of like "you can only control yourself, and your reactions to situations. You can't control what other people do and what other people think of you. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." Those kinds of things. And they all overlap and relate so having knowledge of all these little "counseling nuggets" make me feel more confident and knowledgeable when counseling others. I feel like the more nuggets I gain, the easier it is to keep the flow of a group going. I've been learning A LOT of those little nuggets, and I feel they are shaping my life as well!

 3. Your environment shapes you! I'm around very encouraging, positive, inspiring, spiritual, fun, and motivated mentors ALL DAY. This make ME feel like a more encouraging, positive, inspiring, etc etc person. I feel that being surrounded by such positivity and wisdom all day has been changing my brain and inspiring me!

 4. I realized how much I've changed in the past year or so. The rec therapist has this negativity test she gives to patients sometimes to see how negative your thought process is. I was looking at it a couple weeks ago and thought "DANG. I seriously would have scored SO HIGH on this a year or so ago!" It made me realize how much I've changed, and how much happier I am as a person. A lot of it had to do with attending counseling of my own and just trying to change my thought process. Of course there's always room to improve but it's good to know that I've been getting somewhere!

 5. Just knowing that I can move away from friends/family to a place where I don't know anyone, doing something that I found pretty intimidating at first gives me confidence in itself! Going back to #1, things aren't usually as scary as I make them out to be! The more I practice doing things that are scary, the more truth this statement will carry.

 6. Being alone is awesome. Okay, I knew this before my internship but I thought it would be much harder moving somewhere and not knowing anyone. NOPE. It's actually pretty wonderful. I'm sure it would suck if I wasn't gone all day but it's so satisfying to go to work and do awesome things all day, and then to come home, relax, and have ME TIME. I don't feel pressures to hang out with people or stress from having to do homework assignments. Some people may say "you need to get out and do things and get involved!" Well I quite frankly disagree. I'm only here for 5 months, and it's really wonderful to take time to do things for myself that I want to do. I've been writing music, exercising, reflecting... it's great. Obviously I feel lonely at times but really not as much as I thought I would. I don't feel the need to hang out with people, or get involved in things, and it's actually quite freeing. Okay, I went to choir practice with the rec therapist a few times and I've been going to church but I am absolutely drained from work every day when I get home and look forward to being alone.

 So I'm sure there are more things but those are the few that I could think of right now. Maybe I'll make more "things I'm learning" posts in the future. :) Also I am in Tallahassee for the weekend! I'm staying with Sarah and it's very refreshing to be around old friends. I feel like we are roommates again <3 (even if just for a weekend.)